Photo
professionalcinnabon:

tabloid-lover:

jamietheundeadamerican:

iwillmindfuckyou:

kneel-on-nails:

forever-kitten:

Damn son our uterus stretches like 5x the size and then contracts and pushes a 7 pound baby out of a small tube into life if you think that isn’t metal as fuck get out of my face

YOUR ORGANS THOUGH IM SO SORRY LADIES

damn selfish babies taking up all the space

NAW MAN, LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT PREGNANCY AND BABIES, ALRIGHT?
FIRST OF ALL, IT SUCKS DICK. FIRST OFF LET ME GIVE YOU A MOTHERFUCKING RUNDOWN ON WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T EAT OR DRINK WHEN YOU’RE PREGNANT.
SUSHI
EGGS
NO UNCOOKED ANYTHING IN FUCKING GENERAL ACTUALLY. AND ESPECIALLY NOT FISH.
ANYTHING WITH CAFFEINE IN IT, WHICH INCLUDES COFFEE, SODA, CHOCOLATE (THAT’S RIGHT, NO CHOCOLATE), SEVERAL TYPES OF COOKIES AND CANDIES, AND ENERGY DRINKS.
VEGETABLES AND MEATS THAT ARE RICH IN NITRATES LIKE HOTDOGS, SAUSAGE, LETTUCE, SPINACH AND CELERY.
SO BASICALLY IF YOU’RE USED TO EATING OR DRINKING ANY OF THOSE THINGS YOU BETTER BE PREPARED TO QUIT COLD TURKEY THE SECOND YOU GET PREGNANT.
NOW I’M NOT EVEN DONE. YOU SEE THAT PINK UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE BELOW THE BABY’S HEAD? YEAH? THAT’S YOUR BLADDER. BABIES SQUEEZE DOWN ON THAT LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW AND ONCE YOU HIT THE THIRD TRIMESTER, YOU BASICALLY HAVE AN ELDERLY PERSON’S BLADDER. MY MOTHER TELLS ME SHE HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AT LEAST 6 TIMES A DAY JUST SO SHE WOULDN’T WET HERSELF. ALSO WITH A BABY SQUEEZING’ UP AGAINST YOUR FUCKING INTESTINES LIKE THAT SAY HELLO TO CONSTIPATION NATION, EVERYONE.
SO NOT ONLY DO YOU HAVE THE BLADDER AND BOWELS OF AN OLD PERSON, BUT THAT GROWING HUMAN BEING GROWING OUT OF YOUR GULLET ALSO PUTS A HUUUUGE STRAIN ON YOUR BACK. NOT TO MENTION IT’S A PAIN IN THE FUCKING ASS TO MOVE ANYWHERE, SINCE YOU NEED TO START WALKING LIKE SOMEONE OUT OF A MONTY PYTHON SKIT JUST TO GET AROUND EFFICIENTLY. ALSO THAT ADDED WEIGHT MAKES YOUR FEET ACHE SOMETHING AWFUL. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?
WELL GUESS WHAT. YOU CAN’T TAKE ASPRIN. ABSOLUTELY NO ASPRIN. NO IBUPROFEN, NO NAPROXEN NO NOTHING. 
SO NOT ONLY ARE YOU IN PROBABLY THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE YOU WILL EVER BE, BUT YOUR MEDICINE CHOICES ARE EXTREMELY FUCKING LIMITED. (AND NO, I MENTIONED NO CHOCOLATE EITHER.)
DO YOU GUYS NOT REALIZE THAT THE FATE OF SOCIETY AND THE HUMAN RACE IN GENERAL IS BASED ON THE FACT THAT WOMEN MOSTLY CHOOSE TO GET PREGNANT? FOR LITTLE TO NO REWARD?! THE UNITED STATES ONLY GIVES 12 UNPAID WEEKS OF MATERNITY LEAVE ON AVERAGE. 
YOU WOULD THINK THAT THE FUCKING PROCESS BY WHICH OUR POPULATION CONTINUES TO GROW WOULD BE FUCKING REWARDED AND CELEBRATED, NOT SWEPT UNDER THE FUCKING RUG LIKE A PIECE OF FUCKING DUST.
/RANT OVER

Greatest rant ever.

smackdown

professionalcinnabon:

tabloid-lover:

jamietheundeadamerican:

iwillmindfuckyou:

kneel-on-nails:

forever-kitten:

Damn son our uterus stretches like 5x the size and then contracts and pushes a 7 pound baby out of a small tube into life if you think that isn’t metal as fuck get out of my face

YOUR ORGANS THOUGH IM SO SORRY LADIES

damn selfish babies taking up all the space

NAW MAN, LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT PREGNANCY AND BABIES, ALRIGHT?

FIRST OF ALL, IT SUCKS DICK. FIRST OFF LET ME GIVE YOU A MOTHERFUCKING RUNDOWN ON WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T EAT OR DRINK WHEN YOU’RE PREGNANT.

  • SUSHI
  • EGGS
  • NO UNCOOKED ANYTHING IN FUCKING GENERAL ACTUALLY. AND ESPECIALLY NOT FISH.
  • ANYTHING WITH CAFFEINE IN IT, WHICH INCLUDES COFFEE, SODA, CHOCOLATE (THAT’S RIGHT, NO CHOCOLATE), SEVERAL TYPES OF COOKIES AND CANDIES, AND ENERGY DRINKS.
  • VEGETABLES AND MEATS THAT ARE RICH IN NITRATES LIKE HOTDOGS, SAUSAGE, LETTUCE, SPINACH AND CELERY.

SO BASICALLY IF YOU’RE USED TO EATING OR DRINKING ANY OF THOSE THINGS YOU BETTER BE PREPARED TO QUIT COLD TURKEY THE SECOND YOU GET PREGNANT.

NOW I’M NOT EVEN DONE. YOU SEE THAT PINK UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE BELOW THE BABY’S HEAD? YEAH? THAT’S YOUR BLADDER. BABIES SQUEEZE DOWN ON THAT LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW AND ONCE YOU HIT THE THIRD TRIMESTER, YOU BASICALLY HAVE AN ELDERLY PERSON’S BLADDER. MY MOTHER TELLS ME SHE HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AT LEAST 6 TIMES A DAY JUST SO SHE WOULDN’T WET HERSELF. ALSO WITH A BABY SQUEEZING’ UP AGAINST YOUR FUCKING INTESTINES LIKE THAT SAY HELLO TO CONSTIPATION NATION, EVERYONE.

SO NOT ONLY DO YOU HAVE THE BLADDER AND BOWELS OF AN OLD PERSON, BUT THAT GROWING HUMAN BEING GROWING OUT OF YOUR GULLET ALSO PUTS A HUUUUGE STRAIN ON YOUR BACK. NOT TO MENTION IT’S A PAIN IN THE FUCKING ASS TO MOVE ANYWHERE, SINCE YOU NEED TO START WALKING LIKE SOMEONE OUT OF A MONTY PYTHON SKIT JUST TO GET AROUND EFFICIENTLY. ALSO THAT ADDED WEIGHT MAKES YOUR FEET ACHE SOMETHING AWFUL. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?

WELL GUESS WHAT. YOU CAN’T TAKE ASPRIN. ABSOLUTELY NO ASPRIN. NO IBUPROFEN, NO NAPROXEN NO NOTHING. 

SO NOT ONLY ARE YOU IN PROBABLY THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE YOU WILL EVER BE, BUT YOUR MEDICINE CHOICES ARE EXTREMELY FUCKING LIMITED. (AND NO, I MENTIONED NO CHOCOLATE EITHER.)

DO YOU GUYS NOT REALIZE THAT THE FATE OF SOCIETY AND THE HUMAN RACE IN GENERAL IS BASED ON THE FACT THAT WOMEN MOSTLY CHOOSE TO GET PREGNANT? FOR LITTLE TO NO REWARD?! THE UNITED STATES ONLY GIVES 12 UNPAID WEEKS OF MATERNITY LEAVE ON AVERAGE. 

YOU WOULD THINK THAT THE FUCKING PROCESS BY WHICH OUR POPULATION CONTINUES TO GROW WOULD BE FUCKING REWARDED AND CELEBRATED, NOT SWEPT UNDER THE FUCKING RUG LIKE A PIECE OF FUCKING DUST.

/RANT OVER

Greatest rant ever.

smackdown

(via superwholockedkilljoyonmars)

Source: choosechoice
Photo
Text

sebthemagicdragon:

takanye:

echat:

all you girls out there had that stage where you played online dress up games dont even lie

what do you mean had

what do you mean girls

(via scotland-graveyard)

Photo
myvariousladyboners:

Best Dressed of 2013

Scarlett Johansson in Versace | ‘Under the Skin’ Premiere | Venice Film Festival 

myvariousladyboners:

Best Dressed of 2013

Scarlett Johansson in Versace | ‘Under the Skin’ Premiere | Venice Film Festival 

(via scotland-graveyard)

Source: myvariousladyboners
Text

intensional:

i use the word fuck so excessively i sometimes forget it’s a swear word

(via scotland-graveyard)

Source: intensional
Text

bikinipowerbottom:

billiamswheatdown:

ladygagarbage:

when you masturbate twice on the same day

image

When you finger yourself while masturbating

image

when you try to suck your dick and you break your ribs

image

(via kawaiitimelord)

Source: ladygagarbage
Photo Set

queenanthai:

gothiccharmschool:

skelepoison-spooks:

IT HAS BEGUN

THREAT LEVEL PUMPKIN

IT’S FUCKING JULY

(via kawaiitimelord)

Source: skelepoison-spooks
Photo Set

roymaes:

the greatest plan in history

(via doyoulovemecastiel)

Source: roymaes
Photo

notloki:

pushedoffaclef:

majorsarcasm19:

nicoception:

iketheravinghawk:

graham-bailey:

playcount:

Google has had some stunning logos over the years, but this one is a showstopper.

I really really love this.

anybody else think of avatar?

Long ago, the websites lived together in harmony…

Then everything changed when Windows Vista attacked!

Only Google, Master of All Search Engines could stop it.

But when the internet needed it most, Google vanished. 

Years passed, and a new Search Engine was discovered, a Search Engine named Bing.

And Bing couldn’t search for shit. Everyone died.

And Bing couldn’t search for shit. Everyone died.

(via scotland-graveyard)

Source: xiamozhiai
Text

meanplastic:

"i’m so full…. do you want these nuggets?”

image

(via scotland-graveyard)

Photo Set

meadow10134:

you-egg:

deanwinchesterackles:

50shadesofsuperwholock:

swashbucklingsherlock:

A while ago whilst watching supernatural, I began to wonder about the burning-on-the-ceiling deaths and why on earth their stomachs bled, which then led to to the possible horrifying conclusion that the women targeted may have been pregnant at the time.

John and Mary had a baby but you never know, they could have accidentally made another

The woman who narrowly escaped this fate was part of a new family with a new baby and again there’s the possibility.

Finally there’s Jess, her and Sam would have had a sexual relationship and again there could have been a small moose growing in her tummy.

Obviously if this even a possibility the pregnancy would be just starting and unknown to the mother and father, but it would explain the whole bloody stomach thing

Or this may just be me putting more pain into an already painful situation

image

Okay but what if Sam thought of that too.

Azazel even said that Sam was going to propose to her…. What if he already knew and that’s why he wanted to marry her? Y’know, to step up and  do the right thing.

Guys pls

(via winchestercoldplayer)

Source: swashbucklingsherlock
Text

mauridianhallow:

beatlesboobsandbulges:

My dad just said: at your age you’ll probably wanna try a lot of things. Boys, girls, being a girl, being a boy, being punk or goth or spunky. And im okay with that. As long as you don’t come home and tell me youre a republican

parents who care

(via doyoulovemecastiel)

Source: beatlesboobsandbulges
Photo Set

sageofmagic:

memegrandpa:

helbows:

Introducing the Social Intelligence Test! From what I can tell, it’s sponsored by Harvard and it’s rather interesting. The basis is you look at pictures of people going through different emotions and decide what emotion they’re feeling. The trick is, you can only see their eyes.

How well can you read people? I never thought I was good at it, but I scored rather high on this test. It was a very interesting experience! I highly recommend taking this!

13 out of 36…

28 out of 36

(via belleillumina)

Source: helbows
Text

gentlemanbones:

samurott:

*blows kiss down to the ground (for the skeletons)*

image

(via koujakrude)

Source: raidoucoolzunoha
Photo
minamarrrina:

colouredsounds97:

J.K Rowling added this to the series.


GOODBYE

minamarrrina:

colouredsounds97:

J.K Rowling added this to the series.

GOODBYE

(via winchestercoldplayer)

Source: colouredsounds97